Q: I have had these bad thoughts about cursing God. I love Him with all my heart, I believe in Him from my heart, yet I can’t control these thoughts. Please help. I think I’m going to hell. I’m scared and crying; I pray about it — I don’t want to go to hell.
A: You don’t say what’s causing these bad thoughts. Are they popping up on their own or are you angry at Him for a specific reason? In other words, are they the result of emotional or mental problems or because things aren’t going your way in external situations? After being assured of His love for you, you also need to address the cause, both because it’s wrong of itself and because of the ongoing misery it’s bringing to you.
If either leads to cursing at God, you have, of course, sinned. However, your getting to the root of the problem will take different courses depending upon the cause. As for the cursing itself, I suspect that you’re concerned that you are on the brink of committing an unforgivable sin. Yet your very worries lead me to think that this isn’t the case.
The person whose sin remains unforgiven is the person who denies God’s power to forgive or His right to hold us in judgment. Such a person rejects either God’s holiness and wrath over sin or else denies the Savior’s blood-bought forgiveness on the cross.
Anger against God is not usually unforgivable. Most often, those who yell at God do it because they know God’s power and His mercy and are upset because they aren’t seeing this concern more clearly in their own lives. Trust His forgiveness and give your sin to Him, just as you gave Him your anger.
Then ask Him to lead you through a thorough assessment of yourself, whether on your own or under guidance of counselor, psychologist or others — along with a caring pastor.
Remember this: God forgives sin, even the sin of anger at Him. Scripture occasionally shows Him allowing it to continue for an extended time, as witness Moses’s several outbursts in the Wilderness, some of the Psalms, or Jeremiah (see chapter 15, where the Lord rebukes the prophet more for doubting Him than for yelling at Him).
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